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Dirty Washing

by The Foul

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1.
Porn Stash 03:04
Let the sideshow begin In Japan lived a guy And this man was called Joji Onanism was his bag Till his jazz mags fought back Ever since his balls dropped He played till his eyes popped Buried under for months He was killed by porn stash, by porn stash, by porn stash Ooh ah by porn stash, by porn stash, by porn stash Broken back and crushed lungs Under 6 metric tons His family tried to be discreet Why couldn't he just read Heat?
2.
I traversed the genres like a behemoth First I was a post punk and then I was a goth I used to just drink Tennents, but then I turned to Grouse But all of that collapsed when I discovered acid house Sure I loved The Cure, I loved The Cure, I loved The Cure Sure I went to Pure, I went to Pure, I went to Pure Sure I can't be sure, I can't be sure, I can't be sure Take me back to Stenhouse, take me back to Stenhousemuir 80s Embra man When you live in Fife and your life is average You have to fill your empty twenties going o'er the bridge You join a gang and hoover up anything you find Before you know it, a decade's gone and you have lost your mind
3.
They're lying in the hospital They're lying in the press They're lying on their backs screaming yes yes yes They're lying to protect themselves They're lying to pretend They're dying for a break Dying for the weekend Everyone looks up and gasps Swirling colours, swirling gas The sky at night shall come to pass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Planet gazing - a new way of seeing Brian Cox, Dara O'Brian Looking through Gary Numan's eyes A popular science TV franchise A race to the bottom and the top of the class Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Everyone looks up and gasps Swirling colours, swirling gas The sky at night shall come to pass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Everyone looks up and gasps Swirling colours, swirling gas The sky at night shall come to pass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass They're lying in the hospital They're lying in the press They're lying on their backs screaming yes yes yes They're lying to protect themselves They're lying to pretend They're dying for a break Dying for the weekend A race to the bottom and the top of the class Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass Aurora Borealis Through The Looking Glass
4.
Jewemy stole my hole punch He's vewy vewy bad If he goes near my stapler I'm gonny phone ma dad He's ruining the party He's pissing on the trifles He's spitting in the Eton Mess And singing Eton Rifles He's shredding video cassettes Behind the filing cabinets Look out for the reds Underneath your spread......sheets chorus Oh here come the Whips Here come the Whips Here come the Whips Hide yer paper clips Oh Jeremy - the enemy within The meeeja's tellin me he's Joseph Stalin The PLP, MI5 and MI6 Are all sharpening their ice picks But he's not so much a Trotskyite He couldn't set a ballot box alight Ours is not to reason why The Scottish branch will just comply chorus I don't want to labour the point But what's the point of Labour? Putting tories out of joint Or doing them a favour? His heart is in the right place Just under his ribs He speaks an ancient language While May spouts gibberish chorus Jewemy came to Scotland And tried to drink Irn Bru I saw him with Kez Dugdale They haven't got a clue He irks the oiks and tories And all points inbetween His brain is hanging upside down In the 20th century Oh here come the Whips A three line whip Here come the Whips Get a fucking grip here come the Whips here come the Whips here come the Whips here come the Whips
5.
Hit The Nazi 02:39
I'm punching Nazis for Jesus, It's what he would have wanted to see I don't need to read a moral thesis Just a thumbs up from Calvary Hit the nazi! I've tried singing My Way, And singing Trump is a cunt, But people just look at me, And say it's a publicity stunt. I'm punching Nazis for Jesus, Thanks to Janey Godley, I'm punching Nazis for Jesus, It's the only thing for me. Hit the nazi! An immigrant lass, loved an American tycoon They spawned a monster and very very soon A new right altercation squad were the new goons We're walking backwards through history so I'm punching Nazis for Jesus, Wallop - right off the cheekbones, I'm punching Nazis for Jesus, Just like Indiana Jones. Hit the nazi
6.
by Louis MacNiece It's no go the merrygoround, it's no go the rickshaw, All we want is a limousine and a ticket for the peepshow. Their knickers are made of crepe-de-chine, their shoes are made of python, Their halls are lined with tiger rugs and their walls with head of bison. John MacDonald found a corpse, put it under the sofa, Waited till it came to life and hit it with a poker, Sold its eyes for souvenirs, sold its blood for whiskey, Kept its bones for dumbbells to use when he was fifty. It's no go the Yogi-man, it's no go Blavatsky, All we want is a bank balance and a bit of skirt in a taxi. Annie MacDougall went to milk, caught her foot in the heather, Woke to hear a dance record playing of Old Vienna. It's no go your maidenheads, it's no go your culture, All we want is a Dunlop tire and the devil mend the puncture. The Laird o' Phelps spent Hogmanay declaring he was sober, Counted his feet to prove the fact and found he had one foot over. Mrs. Carmichael had her fifth, looked at the job with repulsion, Said to the midwife "Take it away; I'm through with overproduction." It's no go the gossip column, it's no go the Ceilidh, All we want is a mother's help and a sugar-stick for the baby. Willie Murray cut his thumb, couldn't count the damage, Took the hide of an Ayrshire cow and used it for a bandage. His brother caught three hundred cran when the seas were lavish, Threw the bleeders back in the sea and went upon the parish. It's no go the Herring Board, it's no go the Bible, All we want is a packet of fags when our hands are idle. It's no go the picture palace, it's no go the stadium, It's no go the country cot with a pot of pink geraniums, It's no go the Government grants, it's no go the elections, Sit on your arse for fifty years and hang your hat on a pension. It's no go my honey love, it's no go my poppet; Work your hands from day to day, the winds will blow the profit. The glass is falling hour by hour, the glass will fall forever, But if you break the bloody glass you won't hold up the weather.
7.
Libraries close and the food banks increase And a diet of sugar makes more kids obese They're shutting down culture with less art degrees If you want to look up, first get down on your knees The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls They're drawing the blinds on a bright summer's day Closing minds and art galleries You have to stay insular, stay in and cosy Any dissent is dismissed as conspiracy The Endarkenment's harvesting souls On Cherry Tree Lane, the Banks check their overdraft, a drunk man looks at Mary Poppins and laughter Raises Hugh MacDiarmid to the rafters Whaur extremes meet, that's where you'll find me hereafter The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls Hugh cries Mary, Come down from the ceiling We must obey gravity, ignore feeling We are the banks, we don't do freewheeling Let us caress you, let us do the healing We're collectively losing control but don't care We don't read poets' words, we just laugh at their hair The nanny who fell to Earth will be there Carry on up the bannister Carry on up the bannister Carry on up the bannister Carry on up the bannister The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls The Endarkenment's harvesting souls
8.
I died on stage last night - it really was abysmal My case has been referred to the procurator fiscal I'm going to the comedy school where they teach the comedy rules Learn to move the mic stand clear And say 'I'm here all week - try the beer' Help ma boab, it's such a laugh At the comedians obedience class Introduce yourself as a lookalikey Or the love child of two celebrities then I got off the bus ever noticed how observation's very 'now' are we well? who can tell? Is this thing on? where you from? what do you do? I'm going to the comedy school where they teach the comedy rules Learn to move the mic stand clear And say 'I'm here all week - try the beer' where do you go to hack comic when you're alone in your bed tell me the heckles that haunt you the ones that get inside your head and your heart and your soul oh oh oh knee deep in needy balls deep in seedy
9.
Born Wealthy 04:04
Wig boy wall boy Dirty numb torture boy Special relationship She was a Tory boy She was a Thatcher boy Brexit boy Theresa Appeaser boy You had plans girl boy and steel boy You had chemicals boy You've grown so close to him Boy and you just groan boy combover combover combover combover She smiled at you boy Let your feelings slip boy But never your mask boy Random blonde bio high density rhythm Blonde boy blonde country blonde high density You are my drug boy You're real boy Speak to me and boy dog Dirty numb fracking boy You get wet boy Big big time boy Acid bear boy Taxes taxes taxes taxes tax And remembering nothing boy You like my tin quaich boy and get wet like an angel Derail You got a velvet mouth You're so succulent and beautiful Shimmering and dirty Wonderful and hot times On your telephone line And god and everything On your telephone And in walk an angel And look at me your mom Talking piss to the jams hole at westminster I just come out the shit Talking to the most Blonde I ever met Shouting Aga Aga Aga Aga Shouting Aga Aga Aga Aga Shouting... Aga Aga Aga Shouting Smeg Smeg white thing Smeg Smeg white thing Smeg Smeg white thing Smeg Smeg Shouting Aga Aga Aga Aga Smeg Smeg white thing Smeg Smeg white thing So many things to see and do In the Fox hole true Blonde foreign secretary Smeg Smeg Smeg going back to Romford Hi mom are you having fun And now are you on your way To a new tension headache
10.
Hell 04:30
Running Running for the bus Running for the bus in the rain Running for the bus in the rain in the morning Running for the bus in the rain in the morning in the dark Hell Hell Hell Hell Everyday Everyday Running for the bus in the rain in the morning in the dark and falling Running for the bus in the rain in the morning in the dark and falling and missing the bus Running for the bus in the rain in the morning in the dark and falling and missing the bus and seeing the people on the bus Hell Everyday Everyday Running for the bus in the rain in the morning in the dark and falling and missing the bus and seeing the people on the bus laughing Hell Hell Hell Hell Every...day Everyday Hell
11.
I'm a foreigner from over the border And I call all Scotsmen Jock Now I'm on the wildest street in Edinburgh I don't eat meat and I hate modern pomp rock That's right I'm a vegetarian I don't like Kasabian I'm an Englishman on Leith Walk Oh I'm a mamallian Born of a caeserian I'm an Englishman on Leith Walk Oh I'm not sectarian But I don't like Romanians I'm an Englishman on Leith Walk Oh oh I'm an aryan My Royal Family are Hanoverians I'm an Englishman on Leith Walk

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A collection of rare Fall backing tracks/instrumentals with vocals and lyrics by The Foul rewritten for the now.

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released March 5, 2017

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The Foul Edinburgh, UK

South Queensferry's only Fall tribute band.
www.dailyreckless.com/fall.htm

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